From My Colleagues with Card Carrying Lesbian…Valuable Information!

Since I faithfully follow other lesbian writers and blogs, I usually find the gems. I mean the posts that take it to that truthful place that all lesbians should be.  This post was written by Guest Butch Raye and she is pretty much right on in the area of chasing straight women! Don’t front ladies we have all been there! And it has ended in one way or another but it did end, so let’s keep it 100%. Enjoy the article!

Rules for Chasing Straight Women

Posted on 05. Jul, 2010 by Raye in Guest Lesbian

 Written by Guest Butch, Raye

 A couple of years ago my friend Stacey (queen of the straight chick rodeo) blogged these rules for lesbians who chase after straight women.  I thought they needed a re-up.  It’s great info and quite insightful.  Enjoy.

 Rule #1: If you’re her friend (and want to stay that way) or you hope to maybe be her friend, you must be extremely cautious. Make your feelings known too soon (and without proper research) and she will run. And she may never trust you again. Friendship, or hope thereof, gone.

 Rule #2: Let her make the first big move. Believe me, she will. And the beauty is that it’ll be all her idea. Then you follow her lead. She’ll quickly let you know where the boundaries are.

 Rule #3: Boundaries change without notice. What was ok yesterday may not be today or what was not yesterday may be ok today. It’s confusing and you may feel like you need a score card. Don’t take it personal; it’s just the way straight girls are.

 Rule #4: Her signals may not be exactly what you think they are. She leads. You follow and end up at a dead-end. Shut down. It’s like rimming a slam dunk. Not pretty. Be very careful and make completely certain that you know where she wants you to go. Reference Rules 1 – 3. Note: The consumption of alcohol tends to make things even more confusing than they need to be.

 Rule #5: When they say all the “right things”, be skeptical. It’s not that they’re lying or being intentionally dishonest. It’s just that they don’t realize the impact their words can have. If you dare to believe, you will end up heartbroken. This I guarantee. I’ve heard just about everything – I love you sooo much. I’ve never loved anyone as much as I love you. Please don’t ever leave me (3 in a row have hit me with that one). We would be perfect together. If only you were a man, you’d be perfect. You’re the only person who I’ve believed when they told me that I’m beautiful. You’re my soul mate. I can’t imagine my life without you. I’m going to leave him (NEVER believe it). Sex with a man will never be as good as this. Yada, yada, yada.

 Rule #6: Straight girls get “straight girl” guilt. Call it “Buyer’s Remorse”, if you like. It’s that feeling straight girls get the morning after. It’s when they realize what they did the night before. It might be just a kiss or something more, but they’re going to feel incredibly guilty. If there’s a boyfriend, fiancé, or husband in the picture, you’re screwed. It doesn’t matter whose idea it all was, it’ll be your fault when all is said and done. Usually this guilt leads them to bare their soul to the significant other. Unfortunately, the version of the truth that they tell is one that suits them. It’s enough of the truth to assuage their guilt, but not enough to acknowledge that they were a full participant in the situation. You’ll end up a predatory lesbian who wouldn’t take no for an answer. She, of course, is largely innocent. The result? A difficult friendship because Boyfriend doesn’t really want you anywhere near his girlfriend. Nasty interactions with said boyfriend (either via telephone, email, or in person). Oh, and the potential exists for personal protective orders.

 Rule #7: They may say that they prefer kissing/having sex with women, but they always go back to men. It doesn’t matter how good at it you might be. This can be incredibly frustrating when they talk about the dismal sex they have with the Boyfriend. You can’t explain it so don’t even try. Apparently there’s more to being straight than good sex.

 Rule #8: When all is said and done, straight girls are STRAIGHT. If they weren’t we wouldn’t want them like we do. They wouldn’t be as beautiful, intriguing, or challenging. They’d be gay. Lesbians. It doesn’t matter how wonderful or how good you are – you are never going to convert a straight chick. They may attend the occasional service at your church, but they will never become a regular member of the congregation. They may swim in the kiddie pool, but they will never swim in the deep end. They may play in the minors, but will never make it to the majors. Pick whichever analogy works for you. The result is always the same – straight girls stay straight. They see themselves spending the rest of their lives with a man. Much as we see ourselves spending the rest of our lives with a woman.

 Rule #9: You’ll never finish any higher than second place. And, in love, if you aren’t first, you might as well be last. If she has a boyfriend, husband, fiancé, etc you are not going to win. No way. Never. Resolve right now that you are just playing. And not playing to win. If all you want is the trophy, a notch for your belt, a rack for your wall… you’ll be ok. If you don’t like the chase, don’t even bother. Chase is all you’re going to get.

 Rule #10: Under no uncertain circumstances whatsoever are you to fall in love with a straight girl. Don’t do it. She may love you and even be in love with you, but it won’t change anything. You will be left empty handed and heartbroken.

 If you would like to read more from the Card Carrying Lesbians click here to visit their site!

Mz. Pink


  1. Pingback: MMC-NEWS
  2. Ouch–This is the cold, hard, unvarnished truth. I really wish I had read this before breaking every single rule, especially #10. Wise, wise words–thanks for reminding me to never, ever go there again.

  3. Believe me when i say this post is the bitter TRUTH of the matter. I wish I’d read this post (and had the ability to really believe it) 3 years ago. Straight girls will always return to their men, and YOU my dear lesbian friend, will be left in the cold. My ex and I had a whirlwind 2 year romance, she freaked out and married her old flame from high school. Case in point. STEER CLEAR!

  4. TOO LATE >.<

    What happens if we still did number 10??

    Oh ny god, I'm never going to get her out of my head/life/dreams


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