Have you ever given a ultimatem? Have you ever gotten an ultimatum? How did that pan out? Was it necessary? Did it work?
The fact of the matter is that people do not like ultimatums. I mean who wants a partner telling them they BETTER do something or else? To me that sounds like a threat, and threats lead to control issues. How about we don’t do anything that will need a ultimatem, and then we can avoid them all together.
Granted there are things that do require a ultimatem, such as cheating. If you decide to put up with that type of behavior then you get sick of it, the ultimatum would go as followed, “Stop cheating on me or I am going to leave.” Or if your partner hits you that ultimatum would go as followed, “Stop hitting me or I will call the police.” ETC. So, I guess I am contradicting myself in that, there are reasons to give ultimatums but if it is something like cleaning or playing video games or things of that nature, then an ultimatum would be stupid.
On that note, if you are fed up, don’t give ultimatums get out, break up, and don’t put up with crap. You know what you like and what you will put up with, so if you find yourself in a self-discussion where you want to give a ultimatem because of something that you used to put up with, then stop yourself. Don’t be with that person. Don’t put yourself through the stress.
ultimatums usually don’t work anyway no matter what the situation, so just leave or deal with it!